What Would Ares, the God of War, Post If He Had Social Media?

Imagine the chaos and excitement if one of the most famous figures from Greek mythology, Ares, were to join the world of social media. Of course, given his violent and assertive nature, his posts would surely be a mix of controversies and brutal victories. Below are five things Ares might post:

1. A Commentary on Mortal Woes

Mortal souls, why waste your time on this contraption when you could be defending your cities or slaying the enemies of Zeus? Why give your power to the hands of others, when you have been blessed with the strength of gods?

2. An Age-Old Complaint

Why do they portray me as the youthful, bloodthirsty warrior in those silly mortal movies, Immortals? My strength and honor as the God of War are unparalleled, and that portrayal does not do me justice. Why must you mortals depict me as a young man when I have traversed all ages and seen the worlds beyond?

3. A Challenge to Jesus Christ

Do you know why they call him the Christ? If he were to face me in battle, he would meet his end in a fraction of a second. The Christian God? Please, it is time you understood your place in the pantheon of gods. Your peace and love hold no sway over the war and fire I command.

4. A Vigorous Defense of His Family

In 2017, my sister Hera was unkind to me, and it did not sit well. However, let me be clear: I am no lover of mortal feuds, even if it involves the likes of Patty Jenkins. She has made my life too difficult, but I will not lift a finger to harm Mother or Father. Feel my powerful axe, but know that it is not for mothers and fathers. It is for those who defy the will of the gods.

5. A Solo Performance Update

Today, I unleashed fury upon the battlefield, leaving behind a trail of carnage. The enemies of Athens trembled in fear, and I roared in the face of the Moros. My war cries echoed across the heavens, and the earth bowed in reverence. Can you imagine? Such a spectacle is the true glory of Ares, and yes, I do post these updates for those who seek to witness the unmatched power of a god.

These posts would not only showcase Ares' brash personality and undeniable power but also provide a humorous glimpse into the lives of the gods as they interact with the mortal world. As for the mortals, they would be left wondering what other moments of chaos and strife could unfold on the social media feeds of the eternal war god.