What is it Like to Have a Big Family with Loads of Cousins?

Having a big family with many cousins can be a vibrant and enriching experience. Here are some aspects that people often find enjoyable or challenging:

Strong Support Network

Emotional Support: Cousins can provide a sense of belonging and companionship. They often understand family dynamics and can be there for each other during tough times.

Shared Experiences: Growing up together often leads to shared memories, traditions, and inside jokes.

Fun and Socialization

Playmates: Cousins can be like built-in friends, providing companionship for games and activities, especially during family gatherings.

Celebrations: Big families often have more frequent gatherings such as holidays, birthdays, and reunions, leading to a lively atmosphere.

Diverse Relationships

Varying Personalities: With many cousins, there’s a mix of personalities and interests. This diversity can lead to learning from each other and exploring different perspectives.

Competition and Camaraderie: While there can be friendly rivalry, it also fosters teamwork and bonding through shared activities.

Challenges

Conflict and Drama: Larger family dynamics can lead to conflicts or misunderstandings, especially if personalities clash.

Less Individual Attention: In a big family, it might be harder to get one-on-one time with relatives, which can sometimes lead to feeling overlooked.

Lifelong Connections

Networking: Cousins can become valuable contacts in various aspects of life, from personal to professional.

Family Legacy: A big family often leads to a rich tapestry of history and stories that connect generations.

Overall, having a big family with lots of cousins can be a joyful and dynamic experience, filled with both challenges and rewards.

Personal Experience: A Big Family in California

Family is an amazing and often irritating thing. I was raised in California with my four younger siblings. Both of my parents are the youngest of large families. My dad has 11 siblings, my mom had 17. Both of them are the youngest. My mom has nieces and nephews older than she is. Some of our closest playmates at the family reunions were actually second cousins!

We held my maternal grandmother's funeral in the gymnasium of a high school because they couldn't find a church big enough to seat everyone. Seats were on the floor, the bleachers, and it took the family over 30 minutes to all walk in. All of the grandchildren and great-grandchildren carried a flower or a plant in, and the entire gymnasium was full of flowers. I cannot count the number of first and second cousins that I have. At last count, it was over 150. That was nearly 20 years ago!

In our teens, my parents split, and my mom moved us back south. My sister and I quickly learned that it’s not okay to date/go out with anyone in either of the towns our parents are from. We were constantly getting hit on by our first cousins as we were not well-known being that we lived across the country.

It took us years to learn who belonged to whom on my mom's side because four of my aunts married brothers! And two of my uncles married a sister and a cousin of that family as well. The result is that a lot of my maternal cousins look a ton alike, and it was hard to figure out cousins from siblings! I still get some of my older cousins confused.

As an adult, it's awesome! My aunts are an amazing support system for my mom and for us, and I have cousins in almost every phase of life. There's an infinite supply of wisdom, humor, and laughter, and an immediate connection almost anywhere you go. I have family in over 11 states and know that though we may not be 100% the same, we have enough in common that we can hang out for a night or two and have a good time.

I love having a big family, and I am grateful to be the eldest of 6, and my dad is remarried. Almost makes me wish I were having more than 2, but the way my bank account is set up...