Anticipated Futures: Personal Reflections and Aspirations

I don't want to see a future where I beat up on someone I love once more. It's not a future I'm looking forward to; instead, I hope to see a future where love and kindness prevail.

Right now, the aspect of the future I am most looking forward to is also something I dread. In three to four weeks, my family and I will visit friends and family in Texas, followed by a trip back to Alaska. During this time, I will make a trip to visit my mom in her facility.

Emotional Connection and Regret

This visit carries a heavy emotional load for me, as it is both taxing on my mental state and a reminder of the past. It has been less than a year since the last visit, yet it will be four to five years before I have the opportunity to visit her again, beginning in August.

During my last visit in October 2023, my mom made a comment that stuck with me: 'Oh that feels nice' as I ran my hand over her shoulders. She leaned into my hand, showing a moment of unexpected comfort. It dawned on me then that she might not receive much physical affection, something I had probably never considered before. This realization deeply affected me, and I have been determined to do better this time, especially since it might be my last opportunity to connect with her in this way.

Personal Growth and Housing Aspirations

The aspect of the future I am most excited about is also the one that fills me with a sense of duty. I am eager to start a career where I can predominantly work hard rather than regret my actions. Additionally, becoming a homeowner is a significant goal for me, as it aligns with my personal values of financial stability and independence. Across many spectrums and throughout the nation, housing and debts are becoming more burdensome than ever before. By achieving these two points, I am not only changing the direction of my life but also positively impacting the lives of others around me.

Positive Experiences and Continuous Learning

The final aspect of the future I am most anticipating is the accumulation of positive experiences and the resolution of negative ones. My mind thrives on learning, and this appetite for new knowledge fuels my desire to see a future filled with moments of joy and growth. Whether it is personal development through work or overcoming challenges, I am eager to embrace each positive and negative experience as a stepping stone toward a brighter future.